Marriage Counseling And Lesson For Every Woman (Part 3)

1 Marriage Is An Institution Of The Matured And A Journey Of Lessons

This the 3rd part of the marriage counseling drives from a heart pricking story of a new couple who permitted the devil to shattered their marital life and left them perplexed. The story is quite sadden and my prayer is for every Christian woman to learn a lesson from this marriage update and impact the lesson into their respective marital life, because God’s can’t descend from above to help you nurture your marriage. That is your wholly responsibility and you might also read the first impact lesson and the second in our previous updates.

Marriage Counseling And Lesson For Every Christian Woman.

(Continuation) ……….about eight hours i personally sat in the office of the doctor to get a detailed explanation on Kenny’s condition. All I had been told as I waited was that he was alive and he had been taken in for ultrasound and later for surgery. The nurses refused to tell me the severity of the accident and I had brought hell down screaming and shouting.

Eventually, I called my sister-in-law who came to wait with me and was able to calm me down. I had to leave the hospital briefly to use the cash machine and make some monetary deposits but aside from that I had been unable to drink even a drop of water.

”Mrs Ayorinde, thank you so much for your patience” the doctor started, but I quickly cut him short ”Sir, please just go straight to the point, how is he? What happened? What was the surgery for? Is he okay? Did the surgery go well?” ”Madam, I will answer all your questions but I need you to relax a bit”

”Okay, please go on” I said. ”Your husband is fine and the surgery was successful. He suffered from testicular trauma as a result of the force of his testicles on the bicycle when the accident occurred” ”Jesus Christ!!!!! see trouble.. What do you mean testicular trauma? He doesn’t have testicles again? How are we supposed to have children now? Haaaaaaaaaa Kenny will kill me”.

”Please relax and let’s not jump the gun here. I didn’t say he doesn’t have testicles again. There was just some rupture and dislocation as well and that is why we had to do an immediate surgery. It has been successfully fixed now and we are hopeful that there should be no cause for infertility in the nearest future. Of course, we will advise that he stays off sexual activity for a while until he is properly healed to avoid him developing hernia.

He should be fine within a week”. ”Okay doctor, thank you so much. So when will we be discharged”. ”I will want to just observe him overnight to be sure he is okay. He should be able to go home tomorrow”. We eventually got home the next day after staying in the hospital all night.

His sister left us in the hospital later in the evening after confirming that Kenny was okay. Kenny was withdrawn and quiet and it felt like the cycle had started again. It was still surreal that it was just yesterday morning we agreed to call a truce and it felt like that did not even happen.

”Darling are you okay? I asked after he had settled down on the bed” ”Lola, no I am not okay. You know what? I regret marrying you. I don’t feel like the man that found a wife and found a good thing because it’s like your sole purpose is to cause me sorrow and sadness”.

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My mouth was agape. I just did not understand the reason for such anonymity. ”You know when I decided to marry you I had a plan. I knew what I wanted. I wanted a woman who will love me and make me happy. I wanted a life of joy and happiness.

I wanted to build fun memories of just the two of us even outside the kids but I have not had any of that with you. It’s from one problem to another. We have been married for just 9 months and already I am tired” ”Kenny, why will you say all these to me? Why?

What exactly have I done to destroy your so called happiness so much?” ”Immediately after the wedding, it took about 2 weeks for you to even calm down enough to let me deflower you. As soon as that was over, you got fixated about pregnancy making sex totally boring.

When I was talking to you about just enjoying each other and having fun, all you did was lie down there missionary style claiming that is the best way to get pregnant. After five months of that, you went into your so called fasting period and now because of all the frustration you have put me through, I went to ride my bicycle just to vent and got into an accident?

Did you know it was because I was thinking about you that I lost concentration? And to crown it all, it’s like the devil was trying to crack a joke, testicular trauma? I am tired madam” I sat there in silence not knowing what to say and after a while I just got angry. ”How dare you Kenny? How can you blame me for your sadness or so called unhappiness?

I wake up daily praying for you and this is how you repay me? Was it not when you married me your business went from struggling and started excelling and you dare insult me? I won’t let the devil use you more than he already has. This conversation is over. Do whatever you want”. I stood up from his side and walked out of the bedroom with deep confusion in my heart.

For the first time I wondered if it would not have been better staying single. My conversation with Kenny made me realize he didn’t value me as his wife and so I made a decision to give him space. I called my mum and told her I was coming home for a week.

I was able to convince her Kenny supported my decision and I packed my bags. I was going to go home for a week. The next morning I told Kenny about my trip, ”I listened to everything you said and I have decided we probably need to give each other some space.

I am taking a break and travelling to my parent’s house”. I said Kenny shook his head, ”you should be ashamed of yourself Lola. In fact when they call women to stand up, you should hide your face in shame.

So you cannot take care of your home, you can’t satisfy your husband and now rather than deal with your problems you are running? ”Kenny, I refuse to be insulted. I sat quietly while you heaped insults on me yesterday but that doesn’t mean I will continue to take it.

You said my presence is causing you sorrow and now I am giving you space. I will take the time apart to pray for us” ”I don’t freaking need your prayers madam. In fact, God will not answer that prayer because he has told you everything you need to do in the Bible.

Stop praying for me and start satisfying me”. ”Ehen, so the other day, when I bought sexy lingerie and waited for you at home, did you not leave me hanging? You are confused and don’t know what you want”.

”You want to go? Fine! Get the hell out but you just might not meet this marriage when you come back”. ”Like I said, I will take the time apart to pray, God will sustain our home” I told him emphatically. He just shook his head and closed his eyes on the bed, effectively ending the conversation. I packed my bags and headed straight to the airport.

Late in the night that day, while I sat in my parent’s sitting room, my mum was trying to get stories out of me. ”So why didn’t Kenny take a break with you madam?” ”Mum, he is busy with work, that’s the same thing I told dad before”. ”That doesn’t mean he should not spend a weekend with us.

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We have not seen him since the wedding.” ”Isn’t that why I am here? At least once you see one of us you have seen two of us. After all the two have become one.” I said laughing. ”Okay , no problem. I tried to call him earlier that we have seen his wife but he was not picking his call”. ”I am sure he will probably call you back tomorrow. He is probably resting early now that I am not home”.

”Okay, but Omolola how is marriage life? I hope you are being submissive and taking care of your husband well enough”. ”Mummy, did he complain to you? I am trying my best”. ”Why are you getting defensive? Is everything okay? I hope this delay in pregnancy isn’t putting you under pressure?”

”No, it’s not mum, we are fine with it. Everything is okay”. ”There is no cause for alarm yet. It’s not even up to a year yet. I waited 3 years before I was able to get pregnant with your elder brother and then you so everything will be fine.” ”I know mum…”

The hard knock on the door startled us. ”Mum are you expecting anyone so late? Its 11pm already and dad has gone to bed”. ”No I am not but it could be that our neighbors need something, go and open the door”

As I got close to the door to open it, I was suddenly knocked off my feet by the force of it being jacked open. My eyes went wide open as I saw them, three in number with their weapons held up high. I closed my eyes shut and began to pray.

”Okay so pray very well beautiful girl, you just might need it” the voice said. My eyes was still squeezed shut so I could not identify which of them spoke. As soon as I felt a hand pull me by my hair, my eyes flipped open and I was dragged into the living room to meet my mum who was already in tears and shaking.

Five days later, I woke up once again with screams as has been the practice since that horrible night. My dad was immediately by my side soothing me as the tears rolled down my face. ”It’s okay Omolola. You’re fine and safe. Daddy is here”. ”Daddy, I am afraid. Kenny has not come”. ”I know he hasn’t. I will still call him again.

Just try and get stronger first okay?” ”He hasn’t picked my calls dad. Since you told him, he has not picked my calls once”. As my dad eventually left me alone in the bedroom with my thoughts, I recalled that evil night as clear as the day. I remember my dad being dragged from the bedroom and asked to give them money.

I remember the exhaustive search for money which proved abortive as my dad and mum only had a total of about N50,000 at home. I remember adding the N20,000 I had in my bag and the man telling me I was insulting him with change. As soon as I apologized, he looked at me and really looked at me and I knew what he was going to do before he even did it.

I could see it vividly in his eyes. I begged, ”Please, I am married. I beg you” ”So what are you doing in daddy’s house fine girl, your husband is not servicing you well abi? I will help his matter. He needs help” I begged, my dad and mum begged and his only response was because of their begging, he won’t make them watch.

I fought as hard as I could and for every struggle there was a slap and a punch. He finally had to get the other man to hold me down. I fought every step of the way. I was numb. The physical pain was welcome, I could deal with that. I couldn’t deal with the heaviness that crushed my heart. All through as he kept thrusting faster than I could ever imagine, I thought of Kenny and how much pain this was going to cause him.

I remember him warning me not to make this trip. He kept going on and on for about thirty minutes before he finally let go. Funny how he had the decency to use a condom. I had no strength left. I was broken. For the first time in my Christian walk, I questioned God.

I asked him questions. His silence was deafening. It has been five days since my nightmare, five days since my dad informed Kenny, three days since I got back home from the hospital and he still hasn’t showed up. I have no more will left to even live another day……To Be Continue In Next concluding Part.